Born on 3rd

Inclusion in Adoption with Patrick Armstrong

Understanding Adoption and Its Effects on Adoptees with Patrick Armstrong

Patrick is an intercountry, transracial, Korean American adoptee. He was born in Korea and then adopted by a white family in the United States. Patrick had all he wanted while growing up, but it felt like something was missing.

For the first 30 years of Patrick’s life, he lived in a state of rejection of his Asian and Korean identities and worthiness. He was fighting to fit in. At 30, he had the wake-up call that got him in a state of reclamation.

In this episode, Patrick shares his experience as an adoptee, how it affected him and how he is dealing with it today. Also, Patrick shares how he has been on a journey to find his first family.

Key Talking Points of the Episode:

  • What does “Born on Third” mean to Patrick?
  • What base does Patrick think he was born on?
  • How Patrick handled rejection
  • Was Jackie Chan an inappropriate representation of Korean culture?
  • Patrick’s attempt to fit in as a white 
  • Positive and negative experiences with adoption.
  • Same-race adoption
  • Finding your family and their history
  • How Patrick learned the Korean culture
  • Advice to white parents looking to adopt a child
  • Inclusion in adoption
  • Mirror moments
  • The gaslighting of adoptees as adults
  • Patrick’s thoughts on adoption as a whole

Quotes from the Episode:

“We want to be part of this culture and fit into this community. But at the end of the day, if it comes at the expense of who we are, we’re never going to fit in.”

“I think for many people adoption, like that connection to culture ends once you’ve been adopted.”

“There is a one in a billion chance that I’ll ever get answers to why was I adopted, why was I given up”

“…separated from your family, separated from your country of origin…It’s tough”

Connect with Patrick Armstrong: 





Check out this episode!